Prophecies of Lauren Park

Prophecy:Hey Brothers! Hulk Hogan has this fruity "legend killer" under control. Ortons streak of "legend killing" comes to an end at Summerslam. I'd like to see Hogan choke Orton out with his vibrant colored feather boa or give him a shot to the nuts while he's standing on the ropes doing his corny "look I"m a baby bird about to fly" pose. Randy Orton won't wear that stupid smirk on his face after his defeat.

Prophecy:DX will splash green stuff all over the McMahons and shoot some flop at them. The Super Fruits, I mean the Spirit Squad, will make the match painful by showing up and it will be a 2 on 100 like usual and DX will prevail. SURPRISE!

Prophecy:Edge has to go. Quite frankly I can't stand either as a champ or at all, for that matter. Cena will do his patented "you can't see me" garbage and obtain the title ONCE again. Besides, how can Cena possibly lose in his own hometown? What a disgrace that would be. RAW should seriously look into new wrestlers to hold the title. The same story lines over and over and over again and the same champs get really BORING!

Prophecy:I chose Ric Flair then I changed my mind. I just can't see Ric Flair winning. I mean, his best move is slapping the boobs of grown men around and shouting WOO! I hope this is an awfully bloody match. I want Flairs hair colored red as he lies on the mat yelling "I Quit." WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Prophecy:The Eddie storyline is getting REALLY old and I thought Chavo retired? What a crock. Blah

Prophecy:"ALL HAIL KING BOOKER!" Criminey. Batista has to win for I may smash the television the next time I must endure another show with "King" Booker's 15 minute entrance. No, I can't dig it, sucka. BOOKER T YOU SUCK!

Prophecy:Hmmm, Sabu the unbalanced tight-rope walker or Big Show the giant man? I'm all about the giant baby faced man. I mean, how could someone with such an adorable baby face possibly lose?